TheLastJinx

"I would swim but the river is so wide and I'm scared I won't make it to the other side well God knows I've failed but He knows that I've tried I long for something that's safe and warm but all I have is all that is gone I'm as helpless and as hopeless as a feather on the Clyde" It's my turn to have cracks on my skin. I wonder if this is how you felt that night you stayed up with a big sheet of paper Pencils and pieces of your heart cracking down like the skin of the riverbed in summertime. I am a mountain and you are my river now the valley grows deeper by the day, not by the year you make pebbles out of me without even trying will nothin

Tonight I am the immortal youth Brimming, with telescope eyes on the stars Taking my war paint from broken glow sticks I am a roadside prophet With truth on my lips I believe in nothing. Little Bear, I don't know what to do. I'm on the outside looking in At your eyes bright like the moon Because you are the only light I see Nothing glows on the outside anymore Today I am the skin and shell Clawing for the sky Slipping under, oil is lighter than water you can't swim even if you try I don't have any words left Nothing I say can show you my horror At you, lying still and cold Your bright like the moon eyes sold For a badge on your shoulder

Today, for the first time, I thought about talking to you again. I was watching TV and someone said son-ova-bitch just like you with the same inflection you use and I thought about how wonderful it was to talk to you once a week back before I was your star crossed lover. I thought about how much it hurts to be the one left out of things to have a creeping suspicion that you degrade women just as much as you have always been accused of. I thought you were so much more than this. Now, I wonder what harm I have done by hoping you were different and hoping you would change. I wish we could go back to before, back when you didn't want a bounce

TO: Me, two years ago. FROM: Me, in the present. Being scared of other people's opinions of you is not worth suicide. Adults don't think very differently from teenagers; they can be hurtful too. It doesn't make them bad people, but  understand that they don't have all the answers like you thought they did. Next year will be better than you can even imagine. Stop saying "I love you" when you don't mean it. You know what love is. Stop pretending that you don’t. You will not be able to grow to love someone when they already think you love them. I don't know if that is possible, I only know that the few times I've tried it doesn't really

Some days I roar like the Sun.        I splatter like spaghetti sauce        against bright white walls.        I go dancing on the bottom of the sea. Some days I am the whisper you hear When you're alone in tall grass. Some days I paint myself pink and blue. Some days I breathe fire out my nose        when I am laughing        and the world is filled with people        who grow flowers from their ears. I often sing when I have headphones on. My New Year's resolution is to tell people        "I love you"        more often. I often restrain the urge to hold people's faces        stare into their eyes        and tell

I swear to god, if I see One more skin-tight tee-shirt girl Sticking her chest in the air while posing for a picture I'm just gonna grab her tits.

Today I suited up in an armor of skinny jeans and eye-liner. I want to scream until my throat is bleeding, but I can't so I put on ice bitch face this morning and sat alone in classes. I will be really grateful when clubs and activities start because as much as I love my friends I need some me time every now and then. I hate that I feel like I can't take two steps in any direction without hurting someone's feelings. I hate how I feel like sometimes I need to over analyze things just to keep up. I want to punch and kick and pull hair and bite but I won't. I find it kind of fucked up that I do calculus homework whenever I get stressed out. I ha

The soldier came knocking upon the queen's door He said, "I am not fighting for you anymore" The queen knew she'd seen his face someplace before And slowly she let him inside. I don't know if you understand how hard it was for me to tell you any bit of the truth once I started lying. I can trace it back to the day. It was when you yelled at me for "choosing sides" and when you told me that any act of insubordination was not only a personal insult but a danger to everyone. It was the day when you made me hate myself because I loved you so much and didn't want you to hate me, too. He said, "I've watched your palace up here on the hill And

Knock the breath out of me. Thunder me down under your fists so I can show you that I will not break. Beat me until I stand like an island against the ocean of your spirit. Collide with me and force our bones together; I want to feel your skeleton on mine. Turn my skin black and blue so I can show you that, yes, I can still change my skin. Let me show you that, no, I have not forgotten what it means to stand proud with fire in my eyes. I will stand with my fists at my side. I will not raise my hand to hit you or to protect myself. Throw me to the ground so I can show you that I can still get up. Look me in the eyes and watch my resolve stay s